Lets Create a Religion for the Devil

What would the Devils choice of religion look like?

According to the bible Satan 'craves' worship so logically he would want his followers to talk about him every day, pray to him regularly, expressing gratitude and devotion.  He would never want any challenge to his right to this worship and so he would demand total loyalty with the harshest punishment for any who dared challenge his position.  Of course those punishments would be given against the backdrop that they are necessary to protect all of his other faithful followers from corruption of their beliefs.

He is described as a 'roaring lion' seeking to devour people.  Clearly he is violent and would want to bring death and destruction on any that won't follow him.  He would make this a seemingly reasonable reaction by giving everyone the chance to join his religion first and claiming to love them all and not want any of them to actually die - but if they don't join - they will. 

Also known as the power of darkness Satan would be adept at ensuring his followers were kept in the dark about any rival God or any alternative religion.  To do this he would use a wide range of methods, including threats, dire warnings, examples, mis-direction, misleading words and peer pressure.  Sometimes this would mean a person is thrown out of his religion and nobody in the religion, including that persons friends or family will be allowed to talk to them.  As this is a particularly nasty punishment it will be explained as necessary and loving to the rest of the Devils followers because it will encourage the person to get back in line, rejoin the Devils fun club and everyone will be friends again.

As the Father of the Lie he would undoubtably mislead his organisation but dress it up to look remarkably like the truth.  He would preempt non-believers accusations that he is lying by challenging the validity of anyone who is not in his organisation and bring serious doubts regarding their motives.  Everyone pointing a finger will be viewed by his followers as subversive, evil and jealous.

Being the Great Serpent he would be slippery, hard to pin down, always covering his mistakes and lies with perfectly reasonable explanations. He would use clever soundbites to make his most evil intentions sound beneficial, even kind.

John 10: 9,10 describes his as a thief.  But what could the Devil steal that he couldn't just acquire legitimately?  Time.  He would ensure his believers spent a significant proportion of their lives engaged in working for him with a vague promise that there would be a reward at the end of it.  In return they would give up on any chance of proper education, careers, even forsaking their natural talents.  As for the reward - he would simply keep moving the goalposts with plausible lies as to why his followers got the last one wrong and how each new 'thought' is evidence of ever brightening light.

Inevitably the Devils organisation would be heavily criticised for the many things they do that are wrong by every moral standard.  However, rather than doing his best to clean up his religion, he would blame everyone but himself for the issues.  He would tell his followers to ignore the accusations and accept that they were always going to be accused of things because it's an easy attack by his religions detractors.

There's something vaguely familiar about the Devils ideal religion.